Chasing Away The Shadows
by Lyrical.Laughter
Summary: Natalie and Cristian short story, *FINISHED*
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: These characters don't belong to me; I'm just borrowing them for a while.  
  
Author's Note: This is a short story I wrote last year and I thought I'd fix it up a bit. It takes place in the year 2002, Viki is suffering from D.I.D. thus she is acting like Niki, Ben has been pushed out of the window and everyone thinks Natalie did it, she starts to believe that she had D.I.D. too and doubts her innocence. This takes place after Seth and Natalie broke up and while Cristian was still with Jen but was developing feelings for Natalie.   
  
His hands cradled her face as his lips softly touched hers, she closed her eyes savoring the feeling of him kissing her. She moved into his embrace, knowing it was wrong, yet hoping it would last forever. She was lost in his lips, the feel of his skin, the way his hand entangled itself in her hair. In that moment she felt safe and happy...she felt loved, and then it ended.  
Natalie sat on her bed in her room at the Bayberry Inn; she rolled over on her back and stared at the ceiling, trying to get to sleep. She was afraid that if she closed her eyes she'd change and become that other Natalie, the one that killed. She hated everything in her life right now except for Cristian; he was the bright light in her darkness. He didn't believe that she was capable of hurting anyone but she wasn't so sure. If she'd stayed in Atlantic City maybe things would have been better, she would still have Seth, not another mother, who thought she had committed attempted murder, or a sister who would never like her, or Cristian....  
Natalie decided he outweighed every bad thing that was in her life. He was the best friend that she'd never had growing up and Natalie realized that she valued that friendship above all things and she couldn't live without him. His belief in her, his faith in her… she would have been lost without it.  
Sometimes she wondered how she could not believe Cristian when he said she hadn't pushed Ben out of the window, he was so sure of her, and a part of her held onto that, if Cristian believed it then it must be so... He saw her soul, the parts of her she tried to hide from everyone, he saw her truest self. Boy was Jen lucky; to have the love of someone like Cristian was something she could never imagine...something that she would never have.  
She banished the thought; right now that subject wasn't something that brightened her mood, if anything it depressed her more, no one could ever love her, and no one ever had. She supposed Seth had cared for her once but he had left her for the beautiful, golden Jessica, there was no room for tarnished, unwanted Natalie. She tried to keep the tears in, telling herself that she was weak but they slid down her cheeks and wouldn't stop, so she buried her head in her pillow and wished that Cristian was there, he chased away all of her fears, all of the shadows that she wrapped around herself, but he wasn't, she was alone and she knew that was how it would always be.  
  
"Just leave it alone Jen!" said Cristian as Jen followed him into the other room.  
"How can I? You're keeping a secret from me!" she said, her eyes narrowed in accusation.   
"You want to talk about secrets? What about the secret you kept from me? You knew your Mom drugged Nora and I just found out on accident!"  
"I explained that!" she said defensively.  
"Yes, you did. But this secret isn't mine to tell," he said thinking about Natalie's fear that people would discover that she thought she had D.I.D., he wasn't going to tell Jen because he knew that she would taunt Natalie with it, Jen had changed so much, when they'd first got together she'd been so different.  
"Neither was my Mom's secret and you're still made at me for keeping it from you."  
Cristian stopped, "You're right, but you did tell Al, that is what makes this different, I promised Natalie I wouldn't tell and I won't, end of story," he said hoping she'd just drop the subject.  
"Then leave!" she said going to the door and throwing it open.  
"Jen—,"  
"Leave, go be with her, it's obvious you want to, I'm not good enough for you any more, go be with your lover."  
Christian blocked the kiss out of his mind and turned to Jen. "She is not my lover, you are the only one I love Jen and we can talk through this, you're making a big deal out of nothing—,"  
"No, leave or I will and I won't come back," she said angrily.  
Cristian wanted to tell her to leave then but he didn't, she was just upset and when she calmed down he would try to explain to her that he didn't love Natalie. He grabbed his keys from the counter and left, slamming the door on his way out.  
He got in his car and just drove, angry at Jen for being so irrational, though a part of him whispered that she had a right to be, he had kissed Natalie and he hadn't told Jen about it. What a mess he had made out of everything, he was angry at himself for feeling what he was feeling for Natalie, he couldn't explain it or define it, he just knew that it was there.   
He started to realize how much she was on his mind when he ended up at the Bayberry Inn, where she was staying. He sat in the car debating upon whether to go in and see her, she needed him, he knew that, she had no one else, not either of her mothers, Rex was too busy sucking up to Jessica and he knew Natalie wouldn't turn to Seth because he blamed her for the attempted murder too.  
Not to mention that Natalie blamed herself. The news that Ben had remembered red hair had really shocked her and it didn't help his campaign to make her realize that she hadn't done it. He didn't know how he knew but he was sure of it, just looking into her eyes he knew. But since Natalie was innocent that meant it had been someone else and he was starting to believe it had something to do with the odd way Mrs. Davidson had been acting lately. Cristian decided that Natalie shouldn't be alone so he got out of the car intent on finding some way to take her mind off of her troubles… he loved it when she laughed.   
  
  
Natalie let the steaming hot water run over her body, trying to wash away the tension and the fear. This might be her last real shower, without having to share with several other inmates. She could just imagine having to share a cell with Allison Perkins, or Jen's mother, Lindsay, if Lindsay went on about her and Cristian the way Jen did Natalie was sure she'd end up killing herself during the first week. She closed her eyes trying to block out all thoughts when she heard a knock at the door. Her heart sank to her stomach; it was Bo here to arrest her for attempted murder. She grabbed the bathrobe and walked to the door intent on showing no fear, when she opened the door and saw Cris she almost fainted with relief, she was so glad to see him that she hugged him on the spot.  
"Are you okay?" he asked rubbing her back.  
"Yeah, I'm fine," said Natalie reluctantly pulling away. "I'm just glad it was you and not Bo," she said letting him in.  
"I just wanted to see how you were holding up," he looked at and could see that her eyes were red, she'd been crying.  
"I'm fine, really," she said sitting down on the bed, he gave her a look that told her he knew different and she gave a weak smile, "actually, I'm scared, really scared, I don't want to go to jail."  
"You won't," he said sitting down next to her. "I promise."  
"Thanks," she said smiling, when he said it she could almost believe it. She looked at him, something was bothering him and she had a feeling it wasn't about her.  
"Are you okay?" she asked questioningly.  
"Yeah, why?"  
"You look sad."  
"I didn't come here to drop all of my problems on you," he said thinking about Jen and the accusations that she had made.  
"Cris, come on, you've been listening to me tell you the woes of my life, it's your turn," maybe she could help fix whatever was bothering him, she wanted to do something to pay him back for sticking up for her all of the time.  
"I don't mind listening to your problems. You're my friend and that's what friends do."  
"Exactly, so spill it."  
"Jen kicked me out," he said simply, a small part of him wondered why he wasn't more upset, after all the love of his life had just threatened to leave him.  
"What?!" asked Natalie incredulously, had Jen lost her mind?  
"It's nothing—,"  
"Nothing? That girl is seriously out of her mind, maybe I should talk to her—," from the look on Cristian's face she could see that was liable to make things worse. "Wait, this is my fault isn't it?" Great, she had ruined someone else's life.  
"Any problems Jen and I have are because Jen and I."  
"So where are you staying?"  
"Probably with my Mom-,"  
"I'll get you a room here," it was her fault after all.  
"I don't want you to spend your money on me-,"  
"It's no problem." A few years ago if anyone would have told her she'd say money wasn't a problem she would have laughed at them.  
"I can't accept."  
"Okay, then you can just stay here with me." The moment those words left her lips she regretted saying it, Cristian staying here with her…alone, was not a good idea, especially when the kiss was still on her mind, but she liked having him around and he could make sure that her other personality didn't emerge.  
"Uh...Natalie..."  
"I don't want my other personality-,"   
"Natalie-,"  
"I mean it, I can't sleep because...because I don't know where I'll be or what I've done when I wake up, please stay, just for tonight." She hadn't expected to reveal that to him, he already knew almost everything about her already…she didn't want him to see another weakness but it was so hard keeping things from him.   
"When you put it that way, how can I say no?" he said smiling and she couldn't help but smile back, maybe showing weaknesses wasn't as bad as she thought. His hand went up and touched her cheek and she was reminded of the kiss they had shared the day before.  
She pulled away, feeling heat course through her body and her cheeks flush.  
"I'd better get dressed," she said getting up and digging through her drawers for her pajamas. She found them and walked towards the bathroom, "Make yourself at home."  
  
Natalie stood in front of the mirror looking at her reflection, trying to see what Cristian saw in her, what made him care, trust, believe in her, what made him keep her secrets, what made her worth it. She got dressed and went back out to see Cristian sitting in a chair.  
"Are you going to be comfortable?" she asked getting into bed.  
"Yeah, I'm fine," he said with a smile.  
"Do you want a pillow, or a blanket?"  
"No thanks."  
Natalie turned off the light and then snuggled under the covers preparing to fall asleep.  
"Cristian..."  
"Yeah?"  
"Thanks for staying here with me."  
"You're welcome, goodnight Natalie."  



	2. The End

  
Cristian lay back in the chair surprised at how comfortable it was. After awhile he closed his eyes and listened to Natalie's even breathing, he could tell she was asleep and he was glad. The last week had been Hell for her and he wished he could spare her that. For some reason he wanted to protect this woman, keep her safe, make her happy. He opened his eyes and looked towards where she slept. The street light outside of the window softly illuminated the bed and he could see her face, she looked so innocent, so beautiful, he wanted to capture her in that moment. She made him want to paint, something he hadn't felt for a long time now. He suddenly realized he was falling in love with her. This news took him by surprise and he could only sit there to stunned to think, but thoughts came anyway. When had it happened? What about Jen? He couldn't be in love with someone else, yet he was. He guiltily looked away, he should be thinking of a way to salvage his and Jen's relationship but that was far from his mind and he felt even guiltier because he didn't want to fix the relationship, what he had with Jen was nothing compared to how he felt when he was with Natalie and he wasn't sure he could walk away from Natalie to be with Jen. He looked back at her, what he had with her was an undeniable passion, a roaring fire that burned between them, it wasn't like that with Jen, not anymore. He slowly got up and walked to the bed where she slept, he looked at her and saw her with eyes he recognized the many things he loved about her, her feistiness, her personality, the way she tried to hide behind a hard exterior but inside she was sweet and vulnerable. He loved the softness of her skin, the smell of her hair, her beautiful lips, her smile, her eyes.  
He touched her cheek and in her sleep her hand covered his. "Don't leave me, Cristian," she mumbled in her sleep. "I love you."  
  
Natalie was drifting on the edge of sleep. She could see Cristian kissing her and she wanted to be caught in that moment for eternity, no matter what happened she knew he would never leave her, and that gave her a feeling she had never had for a person, total trust. She'd never had someone believe in her the way that he did and she cherished that, it was a gift and she never wanted to give it up. He gave her light when there was only darkness, joy, when despair had conquered her life, he gave her love when no one else did. Love. Was it possible that he loved her, she realized that she already loved him, it was so easy to give herself to him and know that he wouldn't hurt her. She loved him and she knew that she could never feel that way about anyone else, but she was scared, did he love her? Was she just a friend to him? She never wanted him to leave her but experience told her that love always left, it never lasted, but she wanted it to last so badly.   
  
Cristian stopped, his breath catching in his throat, had he really heard her right? She was still holding onto his hand and he found it impossible to leave so he lay down beside her and fell asleep, still holding her hand and he felt like he belonged there.  
  
Natalie snuggled deeper into the arms that were wrapped around her and sighed in pleasure as his hold on her tightened. Suddenly it occurred to her that she'd fallen asleep alone. She didn't have to turn around to know who it was, though her heart sped up. She didn't want to leave the comfort of his arms so she just laid there. She started to think about that one time, in his apartment when Jen had went to Al and he'd needed somebody and they'd almost had sex, that had been full of fire and hurt and need. But the way he held her now was different, it was tender and gentle and it meant a lot to her.  
She felt him move and yawn and she wondered if he was awake, if he knew she was. Natalie laid still and he started to gently stroke her cheek and she was almost lulled back into sleep. "That feels nice," she said startling him and he pulled away.   
"I didn't know you were awake," he said sitting up.  
"That's okay, thanks for staying with me last night, I needed that," she said looking into his beautiful brown eyes.  
"You're welcome," he said looking away. "Do you mind if I use the shower?" he asked getting out of the bed.  
"No, go ahead, I'll order breakfast," she said also getting up.  
She wondered if she'd done something wrong, for some reason he seemed distant, he was probably thinking about Jen, she told herself ignoring the pain she felt when thinking about him and Jen together. She went to the phone and ordered breakfast. She put her hair into a loose ponytail and then went to the window and looked out into the bright summer morning, it was going to be a beautiful day.  
She could still feel Cristian's hand on her cheek. He made her feel safe and she needed that so much, especially now, but he was her friend and that meant more to her than anything in the world.   
Finally breakfast came and was laid out on the table.  
Cristian came out of the bathroom and Natalie thought he looked handsome with the sunlight glinting off of his wet hair. He sat down and she sat down next to him.  
Natalie strawberries and whipped cream on top of her pancakes and wondered why there was tension in the air that hadn't been there last night and then she remembered the admission she'd made to herself the moment before she drifted into deep sleep. She loved him. This new realization made her stop and she couldn't believe how blind she'd been, she'd known she felt something for him but she hadn't known it was this real...and scary. A part of her wanted to tell him but another part reminded her if she did, things would never be the same again, but then that other part wanted to know if he felt the same way. She glanced up at him and he was staring at her with a smile on his face and she had to admit that his smile was contagious.  
"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"  
"You have a little…right here…," he said wiping something from the corner of her mouth. His hand traveled to her cheek and she covered his hand with hers, leaning into the caress and closing her eyes. She felt his lips on hers and she had to touch his face to make sure it was real.  
Cristian couldn't help himself as his lips moved against hers; it felt so right, so natural. He'd never felt this way before, he felt like he could kiss her forever and never get tired of it. He buried his hands in her mass of silky red hair, yearning for more. They fumbled towards the bed, continuing to kiss, his lips traveling down her neck and back to her lips. The kisses became slower and more gentle and finally Natalie looked into his eyes hoping she wouldn't see regret or guilt. She finally had her answer, all she saw was love.  
THE END  



End file.
